Where does the time go ............

Been missing in action again, partly due to more weather storms (tornado touchdown just southwest of us yesterday) and being so tired due to the insomnia.  Happy to report my sister is home from the hospital, not sure what happened but apparently some kind of bowel infection.  I read her the riot act about losing some weight (she is under 5 feet and weighs more than I do).  I know I have no right to preach but she has a lot more stomach and bowel problems than I do and I want her to stay healthy.

Food has been great the past couple of days, managing to stay in the 1200 calorie range.  I thought it would be hard to get back on track after binging for over a week but it really wasn't.  I just needed to give myself a good swift kick in the butt and realize I'm killing myself at this weight.

Hubby took me to some garage sales this morning.  Bought a few books and found some gently used clothes for myself.  Some are one size too small but it will be good incentive to keep going on my journey.  I dislike going to the ladies shops and paying big money for something that doesn't last any longer than the used stuff.  Some of these were expensive brand names so I am pleased.

They have an air quality advisory out today till further notice.  It is so hot and the air is so stagnant that they are advising anyone with respiratory problems not go outside.  We got home around noon and I was starting to feel it already.  Good excuse to curl up with a book and have a nap, which I did with no remorse.

Breakfast
2 slices french toast w/margarine & diet syrup (305)
1 latte (100)

Lunch
2 cups vegetable soup (100)
1 oz hard cheese w/10 mini crackers (100)

Dinner
1 Healthy Choice Seasame Chicken Dinner w/additional 1/2 cup steamed vegetables (355)
2 cups mixed raw vegetables w/2 tablespoons calorie wise dressing (130)
1 low fat ice cream bar (90)

Total Calories: 1180

Almost back to normal...........

Wow, glad I don't have too many days like yesterday, that was a killer.  Woke up at 4 this morning with a whole new attitude.  Sometimes it just takes having one bad day to get over all the things that have been driving you crazy and get you back on the straight and narrow.

Had a great day at work and got lots accomplished so that makes me feel good.  Hubby was in a good mood when I got home....bonus.

Sister is feeling better so that also made my day.
Breakfast
4 oz yogurt (35)
8 oz grapefruit sections w/juice (100)
1 latte (100)

Lunch
1 Healthy Choice Seasame Chicken Steamer (330)
1.5 black plums (70)

Dinner
1/2 cup steamed vegetable (50)
1 cup raw pepper and cucumber (50)
1 Stouffer's Turkey & Stuffing frozen dinner (260)
1 latte (100)
1 low fat ice cream bar (90)

Total calories:  1185
Walking: 30 minutes

Ok so maybe I'm not the most even tempered person..........

Ever had one of those days where eveything you do just puts you farther behind?  Well that was my day today and having to deal with people who think they have all the power in the world didn't help.  Can you believe some company threatened to sue the government body I work for if they didn't get a cheque today.  They drag their feet getting their invoices in on time and all of a sudden it's their way or no way.  They wanted that cheque today and there was no if's, and's or but's about it.  And guess what.........they got their way!!!  I am so freakin' mad right now I could chew someone up and then see how far I could spit them.

Work is a nightmare, I am doing a job that should have 5 people doing it and then I have to deal with imbicile's like this.  Ohhhhhhhhhh, I am still seeing red............and can't seem to let it go.  I have screamed, cried and litterly kicked things since I got home and still don't feel any better. 

Sorry I missed yesterday, I had an opthamologist's appointment late yesterday afternoon and due to my eyes being dilated I wasn't able to see anything really clearly till this morning.  You probably wouldn't have been able to read it even if I could have posted.  My eyes looked like 2 black saucers in a snowbank.

My younger sister is in hospital and they are not sure what is happening.  They brought her into the city by ambulance this morning for a CAT scan.  Last I heard she still didn't have any results.  They are giving her mega doses of antibiotics and fluids.  She has had ovarian cancer and suffers with ulcerative colitis so they think she may have a bowel infection.  Spoke with her a bit ago and she said the pain seems to letting up some so I pray they are on the right track.

I'm still trying to figure out how to deal with the events of the past weekend as well so you can just guess where my eating habits have gone.  Yep, to everything and anything available, although I really am trying to make it mostly fruit and veggies so at least I can say I tried to be good.  I'm stressed to the max and that is nothing but power to the food devil sitting on my shoulder.  He just keeps whispering go for it and poking me with his little pointed staff.  One of these days I am going to knock him off and grind him into the ground but it is not going to be today.  I don't have the energy or the mindset for it.

On top of all that I have 6 weeks till I head to Vegas and I so want to be able to fit in the seat without a seatbelt extender.  So I guess I had better get off my fat, lazy duff and get to work.  Please pray that the next few days will be kind to me and that I can get back on track.

Catching Up ......

First, let's get the bad/good news out of the way.  I was down when I weighed in on Saturday, definitely not where I had hoped to be but down just the same.  So I am now back to where I was when I started my self challenge on July 1st.  It's hard to think I wasted over 3 weeks without losing anything, I think the stress over this whole anniversary thing did me in. 

First off an explanation of Stampede Week - it would be the equivalent to your county fairs.  There is a big parade, rides, midway, and lots of music.  I don't usually go to the fair grounds as I cannot handle all the people.  When I was younger I went a lot but I find my phobia of crowded places gets worse as I get older.

Now on to the anniversary celebration.  I have so many mixed feelings that you are all going to be wondering when I was ever gonna quit writing once you start reading.  My youngest sister and BIL arrived on Friday evening around 7 p.m., we had BBQ for supper and then her and I worked till 1:30 in the morning to finish the memory quilt that she was making for them.  I let everyone sleep in the next morning till around 10 and then we had breakfast.  By the time clean up was done it was time to make the sandwiches and get ready to go.  Now if you have been following my postings you know there is lots of family dysfunction in my family.  Hubby did not want to go and complained bitterly the whole time we were getting ready.  He did promise me that he would not start any throuble but would not back down from it either, so he discreetly clipped his switchblade to the inside of his pants pocket.  I seen it there but made no comment because I did not need the hassle and he was looking for every excuse in the book so he didn't have to go.

Arrived at the hall and of course all the smokers were hanging around the outside of the door as they couldn't smoke inside.  My other sister is standing there and I just walked on in without acknowledging her as she hasn't spoken to me in over 2 years.  Wasn't sure how my Mom was going to act when she seen me but I thought I have nothing to lose so went over to where they were sitting.  I almost fell over when she actually spoke to me and introduced to some of their friends that were there.  Was it all an act, I think so.  I think they just decided to make the best of it and not have to try to explain why I wasn't there so it was easier for her to acknowledge me for the day.  Do I think have things changed, no I don't believe so.  I think it has all reverted to what it was before and she won't speak to me again to the next time she has to.  She did let me give her a hug which is surprising.  The last time I tried to give her a hug she drove the tip of her cane into my foot and then turned away.

My oldest son was there and there of course have been issues with him as well.  A few years back he almost cost us our home and everything we had.  We had helped him to get a townhouse so he could start his life over and he got back into the drugs and stopped making payments on it.  He had gotten the mortgage because we had vouched for his character at the bank.  So we had to come up with the money to cover the arrears and then had to fight like crazy to get it put into our name.  He had taken a 2nd mortgage out on it so I had to convine that lender to remove the mortgage and go after him personally because even if it went to foreclosure they wouldn't get anything.  There were several other incidents that caused me to have to cut him out of my life until he grew up and got a handle on reality.  About a year ago I attended the funeral for my grandson's other grandfather and saw him there so I thought I'd go slow and see if there was anything there worth rebuilding a relationship on.  So we talked on the phone a few times and I met him once for lunch when he was in town.

I was excited to see him as he had gotten engaged and I had not yet met her.  Well that was anything but pleasant.  He did introduce me to her and then rather than sitting down and letting me get to know her they went to the other side of the hall and that's where they stayed.  I was looking forward to developing a relationship with her but that will never happen now.  That is one wedding I will not be attending, I realize now that he doesn't want me in his life and it is probably for the better.  He has all the other relations to turn to so why would he need me.  It makes me sad but I cannot go to a wedding and sit in a corner while he refuses to acknowledge my existance.

Then of course there was all the picture taking and happy smiles on the outside and hard feelings on the inside.  To be truthful with you I couldn't get out of there fast enough.  I didn't even go to the Johnny Reid concert last night I was so worn out and the stress had totally taken it's toll on my tummy.  I wouldn't have enjoyed it so I sold the tickets and stayed home.

There was something else I realized when I was at the gathering.  It is okay for men to be overweight  but when women are it's frowned on.  I knew that as a generality but when I saw my son, who is at least 100 pounds overweight, and my brother, about the same, and they are laughing about it and joking about it being good living I felt sad.  There I am just a big as they are and totally ashamed of myself for having let myself go.

I think today has been one of the worst days in a long time for me as far as food is concerned.  I have done nothing but eat today, anything and everything.  I know I shouldn't be but am so upset and stressed out I can't quit.  Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

Weekend is finally here ..........

No matter how hard I try to get on here everyday, something always gets in the way.  Yesterday we had the thunderstorm of the season, it was really nasty.  Lasted about 4 hours with intense lightning and major thunder.

Now it is the weekend and I am waiting for my sister and her family to show up as tomorrow is the Open House for my folks 60th anniversary.  As well, I have tickets for a Johnny Reid concert as well.

So wish me well at the Open House and I'll get here when I can.  Gotta try and keep the food under control.

I love Wednesday's ........

It has been a super duper day today.  The sun is shining, birds are singing and I accomplished lots at work so that makes me feel good.  Seems like all of a sudden my life is becoming hum drum, no one to complain about, nothing to upset me, wow that's a first.

Have to get back to posting what I am eating so here goes:

Breakfast
4 oz yogurt
1 cup grapefruit sections w/juice

Lunch
1 pkg frozen sweet & sour chicken

Dinner
1/4 frozen 12" all dressed pizza
10 slices english cucumber
1 can sparkling fruit juice
1 low fat ice cream bar

Shannon, if you are reading this I could not post on your site this morning. 

Finally some sunshine......

I almost didn't know what that big bright thing in the sky was this morning.  Oh, wait a minute, I know what they call that, it's the sun.  Seems like we've been living in a dark whole full of water for ever.  I didn't get a chance to post yesterday as my future DIL came to town and I had my TOPS meeting.  By the time we got home it was really late and I was super tired.  We had two members transfer in from another chapter last night so that was exciting.  Both hubby and I had a gain, which is the pits but we're not gonna cry over it.  Just gonna try harder this week.

It is Stampede week here so we get to wear jeans to work which is nice.  I wish we could wear them all the time as they are so comfortable.  Oh well, will take what we get for the special events and every Friday.

I want to say hi to Shannon and welcome to my blog.  I look forward to having you join what seems to have now become a journey for three.  My very good blogger friend, Tina, also fits in with us and I am sure she will be pleased to have another blogger to encourage and be encouraged by.

Just waiting for the troops to get home and then have to decide what to have for dinner.  Will come back in awhile with more posting.

Ok the troops didn't show up as hubby drove DIL back home.  She had brought her vehicle in to get detailed as she going to try and sell it.  Hubby was supposed to call and let me know what the plan was and totally forgot...so like a man.  Well I am heading off to bed as I have a major headache....weather must be gonna change again.  Goodnite all, sleep tight.

Quack, quack, quack........

You guessed it, more rain overnight and now cloudy and overcast with more rain forecasted for the next 3 days.  This is so depressing, we really need so sunshine, everything is totally saturated with water, including yours truly.

0630 - Snack
1 Latte (100)

0730 - Breakfast
1 cup Sugar Crisp cereal w/2 oz 1% milk (150)
1 cup tropical medley canned fruit (130)
4 oz yogurt (35)

12:00 - Lunch
2 whole wheat dinner buns w/2 teaspoons margarine (290)
5 pieces sushi (250)

1730 - Dinner
1 small bowl of chicken gumbo (not sure of the calorie count, thinking maybe 300)

Is it never going to stop raining........

Storms again yesterday so of course couldn't post as I don't have the computers on when we get electrical storms, always fear that we get a power surge.  Had a good day yesterday in spite of the weather.  Work was awesome, it's amazing how attititudes change when a weak link in the team disappears.  Nothing personally against the fellow that got fired but he sure didn't know anything.  My favorite saying is ""you can't fix stupid, even with duct tape".  Some people are just not cut out to do certain jobs, too bad it took management 5 months to figure it out.

Have to go do a little shopping this morning as I need to get a frame for my folk's anniversary greeting from the Prime Minister and a card from us.  I am going to pick up the DVD's that I had made from some old 8 mm home movies, I can't wait to see them.

I have to sit down and come up with a plan for my weight lose journey.  Think I will keep the special events as a guide but as Tina points out should not set any specific amount of weight to lose as it will just be frustrating if I don't make.  Instead going to just strive for a lose and keeping it off till the next event, no pressure just have to register some type of lose.  Good thoughts Tina, thank you.

My eating habits the past two weeks have been anything but stellar to say the least.  I am totally ashamed of myself.  Like Tina I think I have been suffering from some stress and depression and that is my downfall as it makes me head to the cupboard.  Need to learn how to deal with things without bringing food into it.  Anyone know a good therapist.......lol.  I know some of you are not going to think that is funny but I do because I've been there, done that and actually gained weight during the whole time.  Not sure why but I did.

06:00 - just a drink
ChiaTea (80 calories)

07:30 - Breakfast
4 oz yogurt (35)
6 oz canned fruit (60)

10:00 - Coffee
Latte (120)

12:15 - Lunch
1 red pepper (50)
1 cup 1% cottage cheese (180)
3 pieces of sushi (150)

15:30 - Snack
17 green grapes (60)

17:30 - Dinner
3 oz grilled pork chop (165)
6 little new potatoes w/3 teaspoons sour cream (85)
1/2 cup California mix steamed veggies (50)
10 slices english cucumber (50)
1 low fat ice cream bar (90)

21:45 - Snack
17 green grapes (60)

Total Calories: 1235
Spent most of the afternoon watching the DVD's of my parents old 8 mm home movies.  Wow it sure did bring back a lot of memories.  Scenes with my grandparents that have been gone now for some time.  A scene with my Dad holding my youngest son when he was a year old.  The birthday parties, camping trips, my sister's graduation, etc., etc.  Some of it brought tears to my eyes and other times I was killing myself laughing.  Thank you God for modern technology and being able to bring back these years for them.

A small childs joy ..........

Well there you have it, today's weigh in.....ouch is all I can say.

We found the owner of the puppy today and her little boy was so happy, it was worth it just to see the sparkle in his eyes.  She had gotten out on them some time ago and he was devastated.  I really didn't want to give her up but he needed her more than I did.

I'm really tired tonight so not going to write a whole lot.  Tomorrow is Friday, thank goodness.  A few of the girls from the office are going to go for coffee after work so that should be fun.  Also have to pick up the DVD's that I had made from mom and dad's home movies as they are ready, I can't wait to see them.

We named her Piper......

Hubby was driving home from uptown today and almost ran over this little thing.  She was running around in the street so he stopped to check to see if she was ok.  As soon as he picked her up he knew there was a problem, he could feel her ribs and backbone.  She has no collar and no visible tatoo so he decided to bring her home till we could decide what to do about her.  I called the local radio station and put a found notice on but due to the shape she is in i doubt that anyone will call.  We believe she was just dropped off to fend for herself.  She's really scared of people and really shy.

We fed her and then I took her and laid on the bed with her so that she could rest for awhile as the Pugs of course were all over her with curiosity.  She is so thin that compared to our bruisers she's extremely underweight.  I laid on the bed with her just petting her and reassuring her that it was gonna be ok and couldn't help but think of her out there all alone in the woods trying to fend for herself.  She's only about 6 months old.

We have named her Piper and I think she has found a forever home.  If we don't get any calls about her by next week we'll take her to the vet and get her all check over and see what she says.  It amazes me that people can be so cruel hearted as to just abandon a small puppy like that.  I am so amazed at her fortitude and how survival instincts kick in.

We have had some really nasty weather here the past couple of days, over 5 inches of rain between Monday afternoon and early this morning.  It was so bad that the casing around our front door swelled so much that we couldn't get the door open.  And all I can think about is this poor little puppy out there in that, no wonder she wanted to cuddle up with me on the bed.

I'm afraid I haven't been doing so well food wise, I really gained this past few days to the point where I did not even do a weigh in like I was supposed to.  I will tomorrow morning but I can tell you right now it is going to be real ugly.  So much for reaching my goal by the 24th.  I am such a pathetic loser, I have absolutely no idea what in the heck is going on in this brain of mine.  I keep setting myself up for failure and I fail, plain and simple.  Need to have a really long talk with myself.

Remember the fellow that was working with me and not carrying his end of the work load, well they fired him yesterday and I did feel a lot calmer today and not under so much pressure.  May be it was the stress of having to do his work and mine that was bumming me out,  I don't know.  I just know that I feel a lot better that he is gone.

I'll be back tomorrow with a weight posting even if it embarrasses me, maybe that's what I need.

Marshmallow Shooters.........

Marshmallow shooters are very easy to make and quite yummy.  Put marshmallow(s) on roasting stick just far enough so that it does not poke through the bottom.  Slowly toast over open fire till just the lightest brown.  Remove from stick and fill hole with your favorite liquor (Baileys, Kaluha, Carolin, Snappes of any flovor) and toss it back.  These are really messy but so much fun to make.

Well my weekend started on Thursday and as usual just kept going with food and fun.  I tried hard to be good but know I failed miserably.  The scale will tell tomorrow.  Think I am going to switch Saturday and Sunday with Wednesday and Thursday so that I can be sensible.  I pretty much know I blew all my hard work from last week and will have to start over to make my challenge before the 24th.  It is only 2 weeks away so this could get real ugly, real fast.

I found a blog site that some of you maybe interested in.  It is The99CentChief.blogspot.com and he has all kinds of wonderful receipes using 99 cent ingredients.  I know here in Canada we have Everthing for a Dollar store and I never really thought of buying groceries there but after reading his blog think I will check it out.  I don't think that there is anything wrong with the products, they are just brand names I am not familiar with.  So check it out and see what you think.

It really was a great weekend, got to spend time with the grandkids and that is always fun.  Oldest granddaughter turned 15 today and she had her party yesterday.  Again lots of food and drink and Nana without a whole lot of resistance.  And there was lots of eating out as well so I know I am in big trouble with the scale tomorrow.  Will stand up and take it like a woman and get on with getting on.  I am going to kick this weekend eating binges that I get into even if it kills me.

I hope you all have a wonderful week!

Lots more family time ...........

Isn't summertime great.  We had a campfire cookout tonight and had 5 grandkids and 3 adults here to share it with us.  Wonderful times when we can spend time with those we love.  Of course my eating has been all out of wack again today but hopefully the scale will be kind tomorrow.

Breakfast
4 oz yogurt
8 oz grapefruit sections

Lunch
Smart Choice Turkey Dinner

Dinner
1 hotdog
1 cup potato salad
1/2 cup macaroni salad
1/2 cup baked beans
3 slices watermelon

Snack
Marshmallow shooters (3) - I'll pay for these on the scale tomorrow

Day 8 - Time with the family ..........

It's been a great day, future DIL and the kids came in.  They are going to spend the weekend and do some fun things around town.  I took them to see Marmaduke this evening, it was hilarious, they really enjoyed it.  Think I overdid it with the food today, especially since I had popcorn and iced tea at the show.

Breakfast

4 oz yogurt

1 orange

Lunch

1 pkg Smart Choice Seasame Chicken w/Rice

1 pepper

1/3 cup cucumber

2 plums

Dinner

spaghetti, hamburger, tomato casserole (I forgot to measure how much I had but I think it was probably more than I needed)

1/3 large bag of popcorn

medium iced tea

It's funny when other people are around I totally forget to watch my food intake, I really need to work on that problem.

Day 7 - Off to Calgary for appointment ....

Finally today has arrived and we get to hear what the ear surgeon has to say about hubby.  In one way I want to know and in another I don't.  I am praying so hard that the outcome is good but also, scared out of my wits for feat that it is not.

Well we are back from Calgary and I'm really confused about what is going on.  This doctor says it seems to be a bad case of sinusitis and gave him some nose spray that he has to use with a saline rinse for the next 3 months.  Then they will have another look and see what is going on.  There was so much infection that they couldn't get the scope up through his nostrils.  I literally hate this.

Breakfast
4 oz yogurt (35)
1 cup mixed tropical fruit (130)

Lunch
nothing

Dinner
10 pieces sushi (506)
1 can juice sparkler (70)

Day 6 - Hard to believe........

Wow it is the 6th of July already and we have had no summer to speak of.  Today was a mix of cloud and sunshine but they are forecasting nice weather starting on Thursday for the weekend.  Had a good day today other than I was really, really tired.  Laid down after dinner and had a 2 hour nap, what's with that.

Breakfast
4 oz yogurt (35)
1 small banana (60)

Lunch
1 pkg sweet & sour chicken w/rice (270)
2 small plums (60)
1 pkg Thinsations pretzels (100)

Dinner
3.5 oz grilled pork chop (190)
4 oz cooked carrots (50)
4 oz boiled baby potatoes (80)
1 can sparking raspberry/cranberry drink (70)

Snack
1/2 cup diet jello w/2 tablespoons whipped cream (40)

Total calories:  955

Day 5 ...Stupid people make me mad .....

Why do people have to be so stupid.  We went out for a bite to eat after meeting tonight and as we were leaving I could hear this dog in distress.  I came around the side of a truck and there was a puppy hanging from his collar.  I quickly unhooked him while one of the other ladies went back into the restaurant to see who it belonged to.  I must admit I got really angry with the fellow and probably said some things I shouldn't have.  I even threatened to call the police.  Once I calmed down and he explained why the puppy was in the back of the truck and extracted a promise from him to never leave him alone in the back of the truck again I gave the puppy back to him.  He really didn't seem like the type that would deliberately hurt the puppy and I truly think he didn't think the puppy could climb out of the box.  I'm still shaking, I was so mad and all I could see was that little puppy hanging there by his neck and crying.  I think it has finally just hit me as I am sitting here crying as I write this.

Breakfast

4 oz yogurt (35)

8 oz grapefruit (100)

Lunch

3.5 oz pork burger (228)

3 oz spaghetti squash (50)

1 can fruit sparkler (70)

1 Thinsations bar (100)

1/2 pepper (25)

1 cup blackberries (80)

Dinner

2 slices ham/mushroom and tomato pizza (540)

Total calories:  1228

Day 4 - Happy 4th of July America

Here's wishing all my American friends a Happy 4th of July, may your day be filled with sunshine and fun.  It's another glorious day here in Canada, sun is shining and there is no sign of rain, mind you, that can change in a second.

Yesterday was kind of a strange day for me.  Those of you that have been following my blog know that my mom and I are estranged.  I don't even think she knows why she is angry anymore but to stubborn to say she is sorry.  My dad called to shot the breeze and ask if we were going to be coming to their 60th anniversary open house.  I told him we were and I asked if there was anything I could do to help or bring.  I could hear my mom in the background telling dad to ask if I could bring some sandwiches.  Well let me tell you that is the most she has acknowledged me in over 3 years.  She may not have spoke directly to me but she didn't totally ignore me either, maybe, just maybe things will get better.  I am not pushing her, I just kinda let circumstances and time put these little nudges in her direction.  I always send flowers for Mother's Day, her birthday, thier anniversay and Christmas.  At least I acknowledge her and I know that when she had her stroke some of the wiring got frazzled so it is not entirely her fault.  I really love my mom and miss spending time with her.

We are going to head off to church today and then just relax for the rest of the day.  I have some book work to do for my TOPS group, a load of laundry to finish and a showing of one of our rental units so I will be keeping busy.

Breakfast
4 oz yogurt (35)
8 oz grapefruit sections w/juice (100)
1 Tassimo latte (100)

Snack
1 2" sq brownie (243 - ouch)
1Tassimo latte (100)

Lunch
4 oz pork burger (260)
4 oz steamed Chinese cabbage (50)
4 oz english cucumber (25)

I love leftovers.......

Snack
1 cup green tea
1 pkg Thinsations Oreo Cakesters (100)
4 oz fresh blackberries (40)

Dinner
8 High Liner Tiki Island Style Shrimp (360)
90 gr Uncle Ben's Curry Style Rice (150)
5 oz baked spaghetti squash (50)
1/2 cup diet jello w/2 tablespoons whipped cream (40)

Total calories: 1653

Day 3...All is well and it is fight night............

Well as you can see weigh in this morning was positive even in spite of my horrendous lunch yesterday.  Thought I had better post while I'm waiting for the burgers to finish for dinner.

The weather had been glorious today and I've been extremely laid back and lazy.  Went out this morning and got my hair cut, fixed some lunch, went and did a little shopping, had a nap and now fixing dinner.  We are going over to some friends tonight to watch the fights, that should be interesting.  Funny, cuz Tina is gonna watch them too ...lol

Breakfast
4 oz yogurt (35)
6 oz strawberries/blackberries (60)
1 Tassimo latte (100)

Lunch
4 oz cottage cheese (90)
1/2 orange pepper (25)
1/3 english cucumber (25)
6 oz strawberries/blackberries w/2 tablespoons whipped cream (80)

Snack
1 Thinsations Chocolate Fudge Bar (100)

Dinner
7 oz BBQ's pork burger (lean pork mixed with mild italian sausage meat) (455)
6 oz steamed chinese cabbage (60)
1/3 english cucumber (25)
1/2 cup diet jello (20)

This should leave me a little room in case I want a snack later.

Snack
6 oz fresh fruit (60)
1 can Dole Tangerine Sparkler (70)

Total calories: 1205

Day 2 - Exciting news.........

Wow, yesterday was such a great day and today was even better.  Hubby got a call from the ear surgeon's office and he has an appointment for Wednesday afternoon, can't believe it. 

I had an awesome food day yesterday but sure blew it big time today.  Future DIL came into town to do some shopping and wanted to go for lunch.  Well no problem right, something light and easy.....that's where the trouble started....she wanted Joey's Only.  Now if I had only not let my old habits kick in and order the 3 piece fish and chips and to make it worse I was full half ways through but kept going and ate it all.  This goes back to my childhood when eating out was a priviledge and if you ordered it, you ate it....all of it.  One half of my brain was saying it is ok to stop and the other side was saying "don't you dare, you are not wasting food".

SkippyMom you are so right I should be able to lose with what I eat and you must have read my mind because I did ask the doc when I was there on Friday why my metabalism is so slow.  He is running some thyroid tests and a few others with big names I can't pronounce so see if there is some type of chemical imbalance.  He also thinks part of it maybe due to my IBS....I don't want to get too technical here....but when things do not work the way they are supposed to for days at a time the body has a tendancy to obsorb all of the fat and calories that would normally be eliminated.  He put me on a high fibre supplement called PGX to see if that will help.

Breakfast
4 oz yogurt (35)
1 small banana (60)
1 Tassimo latte (100)

Snack
12 very large green grapes (60)
1 Tassimo latter (100)

Lunch
3 piece fish & chip meal at Joey's Only (1231) (and 2061 mg salt)

Dinner
3.5 oz lean pork chop BBQ'd (190)
5.5 oz steamed cauliflower (50)
4oz steamed green beans (50)
1/2 yellow pepper w/ 1/4 english cucumber (50)
1/2 cup diet jello w/3 tablespoons whipped cream (50)

Total Calories: 1976

Someone mentioned that I should be doing this for me and not because of events in my life.  I want you all to understand that I truly am doing this for me.  I am simply using the events as a calendar to set goals for myself.  They really have nothing to do with my wanting to get rid of the weight, I want to do that to be healthy so that I can enjoy these events more.  They are simply motivators and small time lines so that I do not keep looking at the big picture and try to envision losing 130 pounds.  It is much easier for me to look ahead 3 weeks and say I can get rid of 15 pounds as opposed to trying to set a date when I will lose 130.

I am so thankful for all of you, my online friends.  You encourage me and you are always there for me and that means the world to me.  Hugs to you all!!!!!

Day 1 of a New Beginning .................

Well as you can see the scale was not kind to me this morning, much better than I thought but still totally out of control so I sat and had a coffee and decided that I really need to get a handle on things.  So I decided to start over at Day 1 and set some different goals for myself.  First off I am going to list some important events coming up in my life and then I am going to set a new goal for each one of them as they come up.

1. 
   
   Mom and Dad's 60th wedding anniversary open house
2. 
   
   Birth of new grandbaby
3. 
   
   Trip to Vegas to see Garth Brooks
4. 
   
   Trip to Banff with my girlfriends
5. 
   
   Daughter's wedding
6. 
   
   Special friend's wedding
7. 
   
   Grandson's wedding
8. 
   
   Son #1's wedding
9. 
   
   Son #2's wedding

These are all fantastic milestones coming up in my life and as each one approaches I am going to set a goal for myself and see if I can achieve it.  The first on is my parent's annivesary open house on July 24th.  My goal for that is to weigh in at 265 pounds that morning.  It's not an impossible goal and I plan on getting there, so I have 23 days to lose 16.4 pounds.  I will weigh in on Thursdays and Sundays plus I will have my TOPS weigh in on Mondays, other than that I am not going near the scale. 

Tina, I have a challenge for you ....as we both weigh about the same I would like to see you do the same thing on your blog and I challenge you to see who can meet their goal the fastest.  Remember it does not need to be a large lose or a long period of time, just whatever feels comfortable for you. 

I will post the other dates as they come up, the list of events is in cronological order but I am not going to publish the next date till the previous one has passed.

Also, please notice I have changed my blog page to a bright sky color as there are only sunny days ahead.

For those of you that were concerned about the swelling in my hands and feet you can rest easy now as I did go to the doctor and it was due to the steroids I was taking.  All done now except he has me on a light antibiotic as I have a slight sinus infection.

Breakfast

4 oz yogurt (35)

1 small banana (60)

1 Tassimo latte (100)

Lunch

1/2 yellow pepper (25)

1/2 english cucumber (25)

1 pkg M&M mushroom soup (220)

1 small banana (60)

Snack

1 cup green tea

1 Thinsations Fudge Bar (100)

Dinner

4 oz oven baked chicken (140)

4 oz steamed carrots (50)

4 oz steamed cauliflower (50)

4 oz new baby potatoes (80)

2 tablespoons cranberry sauce (60)

Snack

1 pkg Thinsations Chocolate Pretzels (100)

1 can Dole Raspberry/Cranberry Sparkler (70)

Total Calories: 1175

Hubby and I took the Pugs for a 4 block walk tonight and I feel fantastic after today.  It is nice to have a plan in place and I am not one bit hungry this evening.